Saturday, 17 September 2011

Maintaining relationships as a premed (from a female perspective)

After talking to several other premeds who have found it difficult to keep a boyfriend or girlfriend, I've started to ask myself the following question, "How difficult is it to maintain relationships as a premed?" Personally, I have been together with my boyfriend the entire duration of my undergraduate education. We took the same classes, asked each other for advice (though the questions were mostly directed his way), and motivated each other to do well. We always had a companion to share our personal thoughts and feelings that we wouldn't necessarily share with others in our same degree. This enabled us to be brutally honest about how we felt regarding certain professors/courses/cafeteria food. And, our personalities match very well so during our undergrad, though as difficult as it was due to our rigorous study schedule, we always relied on each other for laughter, smiles, and best of all, love.

But it can be difficult at times to manage having a boyfriend as a premed, isn't it? I've always heard girls say that  they would never choose a boyfriend over their career. But isn't there a way to satisfy both options? I think it's so important to understand what one wants out of life. For instance, my boyfriend would like to have a little girl one day and become a father. And, while the idea of having a baby absolutely terrifies me, watching our own little girl grow up is something I would love to do.

There are a lot of technicalities that get in the way. For instance, what do you do if your boyfriend needs to go away for further education? Or, what if you do? And, what if you're caught in limbo for years not knowing what the next step will be? How do you decide what to do then?

There are so many questions that pile up rapidly. And, it's impossible to see it's peak. But there is one thing that fills me with optimism. As a neurologist in her 30s, the supervisor I work for has been able to maintain her relationship with her high school sweet heart. Though, her education has lead her to many different universities in different provinces, her relationship was able to stay strong. I asked her once what her secret was. And she told me that if you really love someone and have a strong foundation, then you can make it work. One day if the time comes where I have to make that move, I'll ask her exactly how she was able to do this. And, if I do, I'll be glad to share the secret with everyone.

I would love to hear your thoughts, as always, so please leave a comment below if you'd like to share your personal perspective.


  1. After 1.5 years spent living across the country from my boyfriend, I definitely agree with the wise words of your supervisor. Being apart from the one you love is very difficult, but with good communication and trust it is definitely manageable. On the positive side, being "alone" has led me to reclaim some lost independence, and being apart has forced us to talk more, which ultimately has made us stronger.

    Oh, and let me add...the reunions are sooooo good!!!! <3 (PARIS!!!) :)

  2. Be thankful you have a boyfriend.

  3. I am thankful, Ren. I really, really love him. Though I have some questions about the future that scare me a fair bit.

    Thanks for the input, Larva :) How was Paris?!

  4. Paris was amazing and sooo romantic!! Missing it already...but also scheming the next visit :)

    Liking the new layout!

  5. Awesome, larva! Glad you had a great, romantic time :)

    And thnx for the feedback!


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